I spent 3 days on Tinder, An Insight into Online Dating In Zimbabwe

Online dating sites have been the hype of the dating world for many years. One of the most popular sites is Tinder.

Tinder is a dating app that was launched in 2012. I first heard of it as references in movies and romantic comedies. For some reason, it is associated with desperation and people are often ashamed to admit ever being on the popular dating site. Despite the shame surrounding it in some societies, Tinder reigns supreme with over 55 billion matches to date.

I recently decided to find out what the craze is all about. I downloaded the app and signed up for three days with the intention to try using this app here in Harare (Zimbabwe). The app is free to download. I downloaded mine off the Play Store app. Upon opening the app, there’s a short sign-up process of about 5 minutes or less. You pick a name, enter your birth date, upload a few pics of your choice and share 5 hobbies or interests.

Something that stood out to me during the signing up process was that you can share your contacts with Tinder. This is to ensure that Tinder can avoid showing your profile to anyone you might know like church members, relatives and friends.

The app only works when your location/gps setting is on. I assume this is because they mostly show you profiles of people near you. There is a verification process for people who may be scared of talking to strangers. Sure everyone is a stranger on the app but the verification process means that someone went through the trouble to prove that they are who they say they are. Verified accounts have blue ticks on them.

The concept is simple. Tinder throws up a few profiles of people on the app. These are people within the age range you specify and the gender of preference. You swipe right for people you like and left for people you do not like. If two people both swipe right it’s a match and you can proceed to talking to each other in the dms or inbox. You cannot dm someone you haven’t matched with.

Tinder knows how to capitalize on desperation so they reserved the best features for paying users. You can get Tinder Gold for 14.99 USD for 1 month, 7.49 USD for 6 months and 4.99 USD for 12 months. Gold users get to:

• Cut the long play and see who likes them without having to go through tonnes of profiles.
• Buy top pics , see who likes you etc
• 1 free boost per month where you skip the queue and Tinder suggests your profile to new people earlier than regular users.
• Choose who sees you. Only people you like get to view your profile.
• No radius limit. You can see profiles from around the world.
• Normally you can’t rewind when you mistakenly swipe right or left but Gold users get to rewind and swipe again

Most of the profiles available to me were of men between the ages of 20 and 32 although I set my preferred ages to 31 to 40 years. Most of the men did not have pictures of their faces on their profiles. The few that did had pictures of themselves in Kariba, Vic Falls or some resort in Zimbabwe. Some had pictures standing front of “big money” cars like Mercedes Benz, Toyota Fortuner, Range Rover etc. A common picture among some men was one at the Vintage Barbershop (the barbershop in Newlands where a haircut costs anywhere between 25 and 30USD per cut).

I decided to stay true to my values and behave as one who is actually dating on the site. I only swiped right for men that I envisioned myself dating, and they were a few (maybe 1 in 10). Most of the profiles I swiped right for immediately sent me a direct message. I assume this means they check the app often and eagerly wait for updates.

The first few questions are the same.

“Why are you on Tinder? How long have you been on Tinder? Where do you live? Would you like to meet up sometime? Would you like to go for drinks? If I invited you to my house, would you come over? Can we chat on WhatsApp because I’m not always online?”

(This from the person who texted ‘hi’ the second we were matched). For some reason, most men I spoke to were “new on the app” and “don’t usually do the online dating thing” but they are “trying it out” and keeping an “open mind”.

Most of the conversations I had were shallow expect for one or two that had intelligent jokes. Most of them want to know where you are and how soon you can meet up with them. I unfortunately didn’t meet up with any of the men I spoke to as the aim was to get a feel of the app and not find an actual date.

Overall the experience is interesting. It’s different from meeting someone and talking in person because you don’t get to see how they talk or how they present themselves generally. Someone can say they play golf and have no idea what the sport is all about. You see what the profile maker wants you to see then you make a decision to entertain them based on that and their looks. You’d need to be a really good judge of character to go on a blind date with a stranger.

As someone with a life, I’d say the amount of time I spent swiping left and right, and then talking would have been spent being more social. At the end of the day I saw profiles of people who also live in Harare. If I went to places I liked, chances are I would bump into someone with equal interests. I don’t think Tinder makes life any easier. I think it’s even harder to make a genuine connection online. The risks of falling into the arms of a fraudulent or predatory person are heightened. Maybe Tinder Gold is available for those who don’t like wasting time fishing around in the dark. And maybe that’s why it’s more popular among those who don’t mind the risk and are seeking casual hookups.